I saw this video on the wonderful flow magazine blog and it kind of fitted with a recent recurring train of thought. So I figured I’d share it with you…
I used to know exactly what I wanted to do.
I had a plan.
I was completely certain and dedicate hours of work, blood, sweat and tears to achieving the things that would help me get there. I never anticipated it would be easy once I got there. I knew I was choosing something hard. But it is worthwhile. And I cared about it. I still do. But now I’m here, I’m not sure it feels right.
Well damn. What do I do with that?
I don’t regret the choices I’ve made and I’m proud of the things I’ve achieved. But it hasn’t brought me to the place I thought it would.
Increasingly there are parts of myself I wish I’d explored more, avenues I now wonder if I rejected too quickly.
And I ponder – what can I do to change it now?
Some days I feel like I’ve made my choices and should stick with them. Others I feel like I can change them whenever, to whatever I want. I suspect the reality is somewhere in between.
After all I have an incredible life. A privileged life. With amazingly supportive family and friends. A lot of what I imagined for myself, for my life has turned out better than I ever could have dreamed. I have health and wealth and happiness.
And time. I have time.